Saturday, August 23, 2008

Cosmic want ad

As I think anyone who’s been reading knows, since the stickies were born, I’ve struggled quite a bit with this whole work/life balance issue. And, I was talking to my friend C last night and telling her how conflicted I’ve been feeling about being back at work and about I can’t seem to figure out what I really want. (Do I want to just go part time? Look for another job? Stick it out and just set clearer boundaries? Etc.)

She said that when she was struggling through some similar issues, she read a book that suggested writing a cosmic want ad—a list of all of the things you want out of life, no holds barred. (She included “have clear skin,” for example, on hers.) She explained that it was a really cathartic exercise for her, that it helped her sort through some things, and that, surprisingly, she’s gotten almost all of them.

So, in lieu of a real update, which I promise will be forthcoming (August has been a NIGHTMARE at work, but is finally starting to settle down, so I’ll be able to get back online a bit more), here is my cosmic want ad.

Okay, universe, your turn. Now let’s see what you can do!

Wanted

I want a job that pays what I make now (or more ☺), where I enjoy as much responsibility and respect as I have, but where I have to work no more than 60 percent time.
I want to have enough money saved that monkey girl and sweet potato never want for anything, can go to college wherever they want, and so that hubby and I don’t have to stress in our retirement.
I want to not have to worry about money.
I want to get back in shape.
I want to find a haircut that I just love.
I want to find some kick-ass shoes and get rid of my boring old ones.
I want to get back into the classroom for at least another few years before the end of my career.
I want monkey girl and sweet potato to know that, despite whatever pressure they might feel from society, they can do whatever they want and whatever they set their minds to.
I want monkey girl and sweet potato to grow up happy and healthy, and I want them to know and to feel with every fiber of their being how loved they are, how special they are, and how lucky we feel to have them in our lives.
I want monkey girl and sweet potato to grow up knowing that it’s more important to be nice, thoughtful, giving, and caring of others than it is to be financially successful.
I want monkey girl and sweet potato to know what a great dad they have, and to know how much I love him.
I want to learn how to curb my temper and not take my moods out on the people I love the most.
I want monkey girl to grow up in a household where she feels removed from all of the societal pressure for her to look and act a certain way. Ditto for sweet potato.
I want to be an example for monkey girl and sweet potato of a strong and independent woman, and I want them both to have respect for all of the women in our family who have worked so hard for the good of others.
20 years from now, I want to remember what it feels like to walk through the door after a day at work and see my babies’ faces light up, as if there was nothing they wanted more in the world than to see their mom.
I want to make time to go to on vacation with my family every summer, and to do nothing but spend time together.
I want my parents to see monkey girl and sweet potato graduate from college and get married, should they choose to do so.
I want hubby to know that there’s nobody I’d rather spend my life with.
I want my brother to know how much he’s meant in my life, and I want him to play a big part in my kids’ lives.
I want to learn to let go.
I want to make sure I don’t let my busy schedule get in the way of my close friendships, which mean the world to me.
I want the courage to surrender my own ambition, without compromising myself, and to never look back.

What would your cosmic want ad look like?

2 comments:

Sarah said...

oh wow, that is an AWESOME list in the truest sense of the word. i'm going to print it out and hang it up in my office. i hope all of these things come true for you.

anna said...

can I just say ditto but substitute my babies' names in for yours?! Well said!